Of all the finishing touches in a home, the table may be the most personal, and the one Von has always loved. For years her showroom shelves held exquisite stemware for entertaining, sets of vintage flatware and distinctive dinnerware, because a well-set table turns an ordinary meal into an occasion and makes guests feel honored.
You don’t need a matched set of fine china to set a memorable table. You need a little knowledge and a willingness to mix.
The basic place setting (and the logic behind it)
Table settings follow a simple principle: you work from the outside in, and everything sits where your hands naturally reach for it.
- Forks to the left of the plate, in the order you’ll use them (salad fork outside if salad comes first).
- Knife to the right, blade facing the plate, with spoons to its right.
- Glasses above the knife: water glass directly above the knife tip, wine glasses to its right in the order they’ll be used.
- Bread plate above the forks, with a small butter knife across it.
- Napkin on the plate or to the left of the forks.
- Dessert fork or spoon horizontally above the plate.
An easy memory trick: make “OK” signs with both hands. Your left forms a “b” (bread on the left), your right a “d” (drinks on the right).
Choosing stemware
The shape of a glass isn’t just tradition. It changes how a drink smells and tastes.
- Red wine glasses have larger, rounder bowls so the wine can breathe and the aromas gather.
- White wine glasses are smaller and narrower, keeping the wine cooler and focusing lighter aromas.
- Flutes preserve the bubbles in sparkling wine.
- Stems let you hold the glass without warming the drink or smudging the bowl.
Mixing vintage and modern
Some of the most beautiful tables use pieces that don’t match. The key is a common thread, the same principle as mixing furniture:
- Mismatched vintage plates that share a color (all blue-and-white, all with gold rims, all florals).
- Vintage silver-plate or sterling flatware with simple modern white plates.
- Collected stemware of different patterns but similar heights.
- Grandmother’s china for the salad course, everyday plates for the main.
Vintage flatware is often a wonderful value. Look for sterling (usually marked “Sterling” or “925”) or good-quality silver plate, and check that tines are straight and knife blades are sound.
Centerpieces and linens
- Keep centerpieces low, under about 12 inches, or very tall and slender, so guests can see each other across the table.
- Use odd numbers of candles or vessels, and vary their heights.
- Unscented candles only at the table; scent competes with food.
- Linens set the tone: crisp white for formal, natural linen for relaxed elegance, a runner to show off a beautiful wood table.
Caring for heirloom pieces
- Silver: use it often. Regular use and washing slows tarnish. Hand-wash, dry immediately and store in tarnish-resistant cloth. Avoid washing with stainless steel, and avoid lemon-scented detergents.
- Crystal: hand-wash in warm, not hot, water; dry with lint-free cloths; store upright, never hanging by the stem, and never stacked.
- China with gold or platinum trim: hand-wash. Dishwashers and microwaves can damage metallic rims.
The takeaway
Set the table with intention: understand the logic of the place setting, choose stemware for its purpose, mix vintage and modern around a common thread, and use your heirlooms rather than storing them away. Beautiful things are meant to be enjoyed, not boxed in a closet.
